Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Friday, January 2, 2015


Trust is very important in relationships. This is obvious, right? Then why is it so fragile at times when we need to trust our partner, spouse, family, or friend? We want to be able to be genuine, express complaints, concerns, and show the good or bad side of ourselves and know it won't jeopardize our relationships. Yet, often our relationships feel compromised or tentative when we do. We may feel like we walk on eggshells, fearful that we might lose the very thing we love, without trust. We may shut down, isolate and turn away from people we rely on. Not only do we require trust in others, but we must also be trustworthy. It's a two way commitment. Although trust is obviously a key ingredient to healthy long term relationships, we may take it for granted until it's too late for repair. 

~Nancy Shertok, MSW, LCSW

Thursday, January 1, 2015

"You don't know what you got 'til it's gone"

This phrase has been a reoccurring theme lately. Maybe more heightened during the holidays when we are more keenly aware of our families, friends, and precious people in our lives. But it causes me to pause and consider its meaning. Why don't we know what we "got 'til it's gone?" 

Perhaps we take our lives and people for granted? Maybe we don't appreciate the relationships or treasured belongings that we have? From my experience in therapy, it seems that we get caught up in our daily lives, often sweating the small stuff, that we forget to take time out to value what is, what we have in plain sight. When it's gone, the reality sets in and it hurts. Grief takes over. We spend time wishing, regretting, feeling heart broken. 

Take time to appreciate what we have today and talk, share, be open with those you love, even if it hurts. Time invested today leads to fewer regrets and self-fulfillment later. While we have little control over what happens in life, we do have control over how we live our lives today.

~Nancy Shertok, MSW, LCSW psychotherapist